I will tell you my personal story of overcoming my bully situation.
I was bullied for 26 years in a rural area of Kentucky and had witnessed extreme family violence due to this bully. His father battered him and he repeated the physical abuse into my marriage and my five children.
I was raised by a southern mother from North Carolina and a father from Ohio. Due to my shy personality I did not have assertion skills leaving my home to go to college.
Manners, being nice and polite with a strong work ethic was what was expected. This lack of verbal skills and being too polite allowed my bully to overcome and dominate me for my entire marriage until I finally received my education to leave this environment and my bully spouse. This situation was complicated due to the safety of my 5 children.
After 12 years, I was beginning to speak up for myself and my faith was definitely growing toward standing up one day to a full fledge bully and battering.
The defining moment came when I was slapped coming down the court steps of a court house after hearing the judge say to my very angry spouse he would have to pay a small claims fee.
I was blamed for his anger due to a situation where I was called out to buy a refrigerator when the refrigerator was not in good repair. The back part of the refrigerator was not shown which was rusty from a back porch.
The two employees of my husbands company witnessed the slapping but were too scared to protect me. At this split second, I knew I would divorce this husband. I had to get an education before I could successfully leave him.
The day that I finally pushed back when he started to shove me I became a new empowered woman. The “Angels” were there to protect me from the demon I was facing.
From that day, my entire life changed. I was a new creation and I would never allow any more physical battering or bullying in my home.
This intense extreme situation would allow me someday to leave my home state and move to California where I would set up a 7 step system that would provide the universal steps for any person being bullied. My self worth soared from all the professional experience I gained and my mission was started to be courageous in everything I faced.
In California I was a bold woman who was moving into a Divine Purpose. This spiritual calling was How do I stop a bully when the intimidation is happening to so many of our teenagers in the schools.
I answered that question by researching 200 bible verses in the Holy Bible and understanding the strategic steps by my mentors who had taught problem solving by showing me. My calling in behavioral management and working with the challenge of highly defiant youth in the foster system led me to go into deep prayer for the solution of the bully behaviors and other deviant behaviors.
The solution came through a National Parenting program called “Total Transformation” I purchased the program for the Foster agency and in one year I was the trainer in five offices that knew what to do with the toughest youth in the foster system. My Supernanny services, Assertive Parenting and eventually Parent Mastery coaching services evolved out of God’s call on my life to solve the problem of defiant youth in California. From this situation I was called to solve the specific problem of bullying.
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